About Therapy
What is therapy?
If what you know about psychotherapy comes from Netflix or the movies, you may have some misguided notions about what goes on in a practicing psychotherapist’s office.
You need to know the truth behind psychotherapy, so you can benefit from all that it has to offer!
Beginning therapy
First impressions are made in five seconds. When you first meet me, you are already sizing me up. “She seems nice. She’s older, probably married, maybe with kids. She looks warm and inviting.”
You sit down with some trepidation and think, “Thank goodness, SHE’S starting!” I ask, “How can I help you?” Then, it’s YOUR turn. You can tell me as little or as much as you want.
You may already feel overwhelmed. You’re not sure where to start, so I say, “Start in the middle.” You start, and it may be very difficult to get the words out. That’s all okay. After all, you don’t even KNOW me.
Being authentic
From time-to-time, we all face conflicts in our relationships, personal struggles, or other challenging situations.
As a psychotherapist, I believe the most important thing I can do to help you, your partner, and/or your family is to help you live your longed-for authentic life. I want you to be able to integrate all parts of yourself – particularly the parts you don’t like, are secretive about, ashamed of, or can’t put into words.
Taking the risk
I work with you to address and understand the hurt from both your present and your past. You already know deep-down what you need. But you may not have been given the chance or taken the risk to come forward.
You may be ashamed of the harsh, punitive way you think, the self-defeating way you behave, or the difficulties you have connecting or making yourself understood.
The treatment process
Once you get settled and get “the hang of it,” you will get used to the process. Most people actually look forward to their sessions.
At the beginning, you will find relief and feel increasingly more comfortable and vulnerable. But you may also feel unsettled. You may discover what has been pushed away or pushed down now bubbles up. You might discover your current difficulties are familiar, similar to ones you’ve experienced in the past.
You keep chewing on the same thing over and over. It’s déjà vu. Didn’t you feel this same way in your last relationship? With your last boss or your younger brother? You need a new way to relate, connect, and put words to the chaos you’ve had to keep inside.
Transference
At the same time, you may also have feelings about me, your therapist. You realize that it’s a relatively new relationship and don’t want to be rude. Be rude!
Say what’s on your mind! I encourage you to say what you think. Be honest and brave! Tell me! Do you hate the painting on my wall? Don’t be shy! Do you dislike the way I ask questions? Tell me. I encourage your honesty!
You may find that you feel better about yourself at work but not at home, not with your partner, and not with your kids.
Perhaps you feel you’re not progressing the way you’d like. Tell me! Let’s discuss! Don’t be afraid to confront me. If you practice being direct with me, you’ll be more able to use that skill with your family and work life.
Your discovery
Being authentic means being able to think clearly about how you feel. You discover your needs, desires, and unmet longings. You also discover, however, how disorganized your thoughts become when you feel irritable, annoyed, frustrated, or angry.
All feelings, including the unnamed ones and those that make you frozen and numb, are welcome.
Curiosity and commitment
This is the place you get to talk. You may find that within the consistent, predictable, and secure environment of therapy, you become more curious about yourself and learn new strategies to problem-solve.
You may want to stay for a month, six months, or a year. You may solve the original issue you came for, but then you might want to stay to figure out how you got there.
At some point, you will want to stop. This is important for us to discuss. The process of ending therapy is just as important as beginning. Discussing your leaving, the work we have accomplished, and what might be left to work on at another time provides important support so that you leave with a sense of completion.
About Me
I love the work I do. Psychotherapy is my passion, my life’s work.
I’ve always been the kind of person to try and understand others. In ten years of teaching in public school, I was drawn to the kids with emotional and social problems.
I’d call parents to collaborate with me to provide for their child’s unique needs. I loved those kids! I graduated with an undergraduate degree in Elementary Education and a Post-Graduate degree in Special Education.
While working with children individually, I discovered that learning from them, about them, about their families and their struggles, helped me make the decision to return to school. I obtained a Masters Degree in Social Work granting me opportunities to work in inpatient psychiatric units, outpatient mental health clinics, medical hospital units, and other outpatient settings.
In the meanwhile, I continued with my own in-depth psychoanalysis, supervision, and psychoanalytic training. As a psychoanalyst, I hold certificates in Psychotherapy & Psychoanalysis, as well as Couples Therapy from the New York Center for Psychoanalytic Training (NYCPT) and the International Psychotherapy Institute (IPI). Long-term, in-depth, continued professional education provides valuable opportunities to teach, supervise, write, discuss, and consult on cases.
Training and education aside, I believe the therapeutic relationship is more important to your progress than my credentials.
While it is true that I have experience, post-graduate education, and training – as well as more than 25 years of providing transformative treatment, what’s most important is how you’re made to feel.
I am a warm, wise, and engaged psychotherapist. I want you to feel safe, seen, heard, and valued.